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If pain is my pleasure
I know no joy
welcome to my world,
my little boy.

How deserving are you
of a life with a thief,
a stealer of hearts,
the bearer of grief.

My voice beckons now,
hear me and grow,
I hurt and destroy,
be the first to know.

And now I go off in my hearse.
I knew that I would always go!

Fire on the mountain

Today there are high winds and there is a severe fire in the Santa Cruz area of California. There are 22 acres currently on fire in the Santa Cruz mountains and it is only expected to get worse. Please keep all of the families in this area in your heart and prayers and lets try and remain positive that the end to this natural disaster is near.
1 love
tilly

Hitchin'

So I hitchhiked down the coast of the U.S. recently and I guess today’s entry is gonna be about that little adventure. I had never hitchhiked in my life, so I was definitely throwing myself “out there” in life. After deciding to leave Oregon in confidence that it was time to go, I had to decide how I was going to get from there to California. Many times in my life have I read about adventures of people hitchhiking and you always hear those scary stories people tell, I had enough cash for the bus or train, but my heat yearned for adventure, for freedom, I needed to just trust life. I hopped online and went to Craiglist and saw someone who was going into California, but just after Humboldt County. I sent an email and it was done, I had NO idea what to expect.
The next morning I went outside at 7 with my 3 bags in hand and waited to se what was going to pull up. It was cold and wet outside and every car that pulled up, I thought was my ride. Pretty soon a little Honda pulled up and a cute little hippie girl hopped out of the drivers side. “Hop in she said” I hopped into a front seat full of different Indian images. When I say India I mean pictures of God’s and Goddesses and a picture of Mother Theresa in India. How cool! There wasn’t much conversation, I thanked my driver, I felt safe and it had been a rough couple of days emotionally, so I ate a few Zanis and went to sleep. We were going through Grants Pass and I woke up for that and we talked briefly about life and peace and random acts of kindness and I felt good. I knew just what kind of trip as this would be! Pretty soon we hit this little Redwood town off of 101, right near the tree that you can drive through (or one of them) and she informed me that is was time to hop out. I popped a Zani and got a beer and some peanuts in the store and that ride was over.
What was I to do now? Now I had to REALLY hitch....in the woods with the biggest trees I had ever seen. It was getting dark and I AM SURE there were bears and shit. As I turned to say goodbye 3 tweaky looking guys who looked TOTALLY methed out said “Ya need a ride, we going into town”. I asked if there was a bus there and they said yes and hopped in the back..right before I hopped one of the guys turned at me, I noticed he had 1 tooth, he said “Have a nice ride” and handed me a joint. Welcome to California Tilly.
I rode in that truck for what seemed like hours. What the fuck is up with these dudes, I am just trusting life. We pulled into a little town and they let me out, they informed me that they were going to sleep here in there truck, I told them I had no destination, I may be back, and I went to the gas station. I waited at the gas station for what seemed like forever trying to figure out what to do. I was cold standing there in my Dickies jacket and so I decided to ask customers for a ride to Santa Rosa, I knew I could catch a bus to San Francisco there. I went into the gas station and told the clerk my story (sorta) and he allowed me to try and find a ride there. I tried and tired and it got later soon I had to leave. There was frost on the ground. I decided to be happy and not worry and make it an adventure. I walked into the forest.
As I walked into the forest I noticed I was walking into bigger and bigger trees and there was less and less people, none. “I am going to die out here” I thought and then peace came upon me. I realized looking at those Redwoods and I remembered from New Orleans that God feeds all his creatures, I would be fine, things became VERY fun to me. I packed up under a giant Redwood and wrapped up to sleep listening to my favorite AM show Coast to Coast AM with George Nory. That night was the most peaceful sleep of my life and I was sleeping outside and it was less than 30 degrees.
I woke up with the sunshine the next day and was in awe at how beautiful things were, hills and giant Redwoods. I was in the middle of nowhere. How would I get to civilization? I went to a tiny store and got a hard-boiled egg and a cup of joe and after the morning paper (like a normal day) I started hiking. The clerk informed me that the highway was only 1 ½ miles. As I walked I was at peace, no one had my phone number and no one could contact me, it was me, just me, off the grid. No one could find me...WHAT A RUSH! I walked until the highway, it was finally warming up and I was grateful for the setting that surrounded me and VERY grateful that the highway was right there. I stumbled over to the shoulder and I dropped my bags...I could see signs of past hitchers.
I put my thumb out and BAM! A ride, on a Sunday morning, for real. I hopped in and asked an African American guy where he was headed, he said Santa Rosa, I was stoked and I sat back to relax. This dude was cool y’all! He informed me that he had just got done hitchhiking South America and he HAD to pick up this kid hitchin’ with a laptop and hear my stories. I told STORIES and told him about my blog and all sorts of things. I was so grateful and this guy was so interested, so I rapped about Tilly’s travels through life. I finally asked him his story and we compared stories about guns and cops and being stuck and how all of the magic happens when you just put yourself out there! I remembered when in New Orleans me and my friend Patience used to talk about that a lot and it made me feel REAL good about my adventure. We arrived in Santa Rosa, a very posh little town and my friend informed me that he would feel privileged to help me find the bus if I showed him my writing.
We went to a little coffee shop and my boy hooked up breakfast up! I busted out my laptop and showed him some of my friends music and my blog and we had a good old time. On the internet I looked up Greyhound and it was a few miles away, dude told me he would take me. We hopped in the car and right in front of us was an Amtrak bus that said San Francisco. I jumped out of his car and flagged the bus, thanked my friend and off I was $6 bucks. I stashed my bags and sat back to some music and the road. Out of the woods we traveled over the rolling hills of Northern California. I was going to San Francisco!! As we rode on the scene began to change, I was approaching the city...the Golden Gate Bridge.
I rolled into the city a very content and happy and accomplished man. I was pleased, I rode by famous landmarks, I saw San Quentin and Alcatraz I was here!! As we pulled into the city I picked up my phone and called my boy Patience from The Omega Project, he was in Santa Cruz and I was getting close. The bus pulled into the city and I pretty much had to get out on the side of the road. Frisco is dope...huge hills everywhere, I wasn’t gonna catch a cab, this adventure was fun, so I starting asking where I could catch a train to Santa Cruz, I had know idea if that was possible or not. People sent me everywhere, I walked blocks and blocks and finally found the Greyhound, when I got into the station it wasn’t like New York, the homeless RAN that terminal, there feces on the ground and shady people everywhere. 2 gay guys followed me in the restroom and were all eyeballin’ me. Fuck this, I thought I am not gonna take no bus here and I will be damned if I wait here for 2 hours. I hopped out and jumped in a cab...TAKE ME TO THE TRAIN!
The driver dropped me off at the train, I paid him 10 bucks and hopped out. I looked at the building and it reminded me of the Staten Island Railroad in N.Y., comforting. I went to the counter and requested a ticket to Santa Cruz and was informed that I would go to San Jose and catch a bus from there, about an hours ride to San Jose. I paid my six bucks and rolled through the tunnels out of Frisco, there was a guy next to me who looked exactly like Silent Bob and he smelled like dank weed. I knew I was going to a great place. We arrived in San Jose and I walked over to the bus area. There were a TON of people, apparently the bus wasn’t coming. This really beautiful girl approached me and asked for a smoke, I obliged and we started chatting. Turns out she made skateboards and to me that she was staying in the Cruz, her friend was coming and I could hitch a ride. That was my last hitch, I was among friends. What an experience y’all. I learned, again, that I can just trust life in any circumstance, no need to worry, everything works out and everything happens for a reason. I grew on that adventure, ad always. All I can say to anyone who reads this: life will take care of you if you trust it and fearlessly take on the obstacles in your way. I f you are afraid of something DO IT, that’s when the magic happens and the more you are afraid of something, the more you should take on that fear head on, if you can manipulate the energy from fear onto drive, well, that’s how people get famous and shit. Watch me through this blog. I WILL BE ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE and you can all see it happen on this BLOG!
One Love
~tilly

Welcome to California!

So a great friend and new roommate of mine has inspired me to finish what I have started and get back to my blog. I had set this blog up when I was in a place where I didn't want to be and I never continued with it, well now is the perfect time for me to develop my blog.
I am in an amazing place in life right now,
no I am not a millionaire and no I haven't achieved all of the earthly goals in life that I intend, but I am am a really complete person right now, totally in sync with the reality that I intend on creating.
How I got here, well that could take days, months even years to write down, so this blog is precisely the place where I intend on logging the happenings in TILLYVILLE.
Recently I hitchhiked down the West Coast of the U.S. I had always wanted to do it and so I just did.
After making a rash decision in leaving Georgia I wandered into New Orleans where I stayed a week or so, being what New Orleans is A BIG HUSTLE but a city that has its claws around the soul of America, or did at one time.
New Orleans is a great place, but I have learned in my aging that it is a place that causes "me" to compromise so of my values, it's just a GRIMEY hustle all of the time in New Orleans, you do it to survive and to stay protected it just IS.
I left New Orleans as abruptly as I arrived.
How did I arrive in New Orleans???
One Sunday Morning after drinking WAY more whiskey (alone) in Georgia, I said fuck it all...I'm gonna just do what I want and not what everyone tells me I should do. That morning early, before church I hopped in the car with 2 gorgeous women and rode off to NOLA.
I left New Orleans alone,
I had a little bit of cash, not much and I hopped a bus to EL PASO TX.
I didn't stay in El Paso instead I hopped up to Oregon and spent a couple months trying to fix the past when I decided ~Fuck this, Fuck the past I want NOW.
I hopped out into the world alone and I felt free.
Now I have tapped into this energy before, it's a great feeling.
I decided that I was going to create everything that I want in the world, surrounded myself by intelligent and positive people and refused to worry about a thing!
I set myself free.
Everything that I had been studying for years about Religion and Philosophy and Psychology I begin to actually apply the standards and belief system that "I" have as an individual and I was blessed with an environment of like minded people....and my bath has become magical.
I can honestly say that I wander through these forests and down into these valleys into the little towns and to the sea and I live completely the way that I want.
I am content.
I try every day of my life to be a better man, I try my hardest to give to people in need at ANY time if I can afford it this second than life will return it to me when I need it most and THAT works for me.
I will give away my last dollar to someone who needs food and is a drunk, because I am so confident in the Universe, in GOD, that I will eat and be blessed 10 fold.
The nights I give away my last dollar, some of those nights have turned into the best of my life!
Now, don't get me wrong, I am not throwing my money out windows or anything like that. My point is that I am not afraid to share anything I have and I am rewarded for it constantly.
Try it.
I am growing into a more healthy individual, and in return I want create a healthier planet. I care more about my community and the people who are directly in my circle and I am putting better things into my body than in the past. I am a healthier person my world is healthier and I have created a healthy environment. I feel blessed.
I spend time in conversation that I had been searching for for a long, long time. I inspire people and in return I am inspired. I believe in my circle encouraging each other and demanding nothing less then success in everything we attempt. I believe that as individuals the people around me are capable of mastering their Universe and together we can evolve and grow and change the world.
I want to change the world.
I WILL HELP CHANGE THE WORLD

I now resided in the mountains. I live in a Redwood forest. I am 15 minutes from some of the best Surf in California and a train ride from one of Americas most populous cities. I climb these hills and I peer down at my world and I see magic everywhere.
I see beautiful people smiling and caring for the planet.
People enjoying the beauty and the true fruits that are naturally provided to us and I am encouraged about the future, I am encouraged to embrace that which is nature and I am more ONE with the world.

Please look for my regular events on the right hand side of my blog.
I will be listing various events in Santa Cruz, the Monterey Bay and anywhere else from Sarasota to N.Y.C. from the Bayou to Frisco Bay that I will be affiliated with~

1 love
tilly